Still Shining Brightly!
Ashley Akinns 6/21/84 – 4/29/07
She lived a life of fun and laughter and loved God in the end.
I will never forget the first time I held Ashley’s journal in my hands. Though I already had a copy that had been transcribed by her brother, Jacob, actually holding her written life’s story, captured in an everyday composition book, was something else altogether…it felt like a sacred trust.
The transcript of the journal first came from Ashley’s dad after many conversations by e-mail over months of time. This particular e-mail read in part, “So you always say you wish you had known my daughter. Well, this will help you know a little bit more about my Princess .” So I downloaded the file and quickly realized I was reading her own words, personal snapshots of her journey beginning in the fall of 2006 and continuing until the the final entry on April 28, 2007. As I read the pages I couldn’t help but weep with sadness and joy as I watched in detail as her heart began to beat with the love of God.
But holding the journal revealed so much more about her, her personality beaming through the ALL CAPS wording, multiple exclamation points, unwavering energy, humor and varied ink colors. But nothing prepared me for what I felt when I saw what followed her last recorded words. Opposite the last line of Saturday’s entry was nothing but an empty page, an inescapable affirmation that her life on earth had come to an end.
Innocently, the last words she penned after spending a weekend at home with her family were, Tomorrow I am driving back to Gainesville after church and sushi in Riverside. We are going to Sushi Cafe-
What is interesting to me is that there is no period at the end of that sentence…just a squiggly line that seems to say “To be continued” more than “The End.” The next day, a one-car collision took Ashley from those she loved. But it did not dim God’s plans for her life. No way. Ashley found life in the One who overwhelmed the grave.
So, on this day that marks her death, I’d like to share her entry from February 8, written seventeen days after she encountered the grace of God in a personal and life-altering way.
Feb 8th ‘07
I went to a Bible Study with Christa tonight and that was actually kind of fun and cool. Everyone was like hey Ashley and did not make me feel like all awkward and stuff. It was like I belonged there. They sang some songs which I did not know and everyone else did but it was cool. My favorite I came home and looked up the lyrics, here they are cause I love them. I don’t know why but I started crying when they were singing it and I just wanted to lift my hands like they did…I did not but I talked to Christa about it afterwards. She said it was just a way of worshipping God. Jesus did take me just like he found me, with all my failures and screw-ups. He loved me just like I am. He has shown me so much compassion and mercy and he LOVES me. That just blows me away, ya know…
[change to red ink]
Everyone needs compassion
A love that’s never failing
Let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
A Kindness of a Savior
The hope of nations
My Savior
He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever
Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
So take me as you find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender
Shine your light and let the whole world see
We’re singing for the glory of the risen King…Jesus
_____________
All I can say is wow.
Ashley, I cannot fathom the loss your family and friends carry and I know they miss you with everything within them. Yet, I can say with certainty that those lyrics you loved so much are coming true in your life today. Your Savior is shining amazingly through you!
Your friend, Louie
April 22nd, 2009 at 2:03 PM
WOW! I am just blown away at how this story is continuing. Praise God for her life. Thanks Louie for continuing to share this. It’s so so moving!
April 29th, 2009 at 3:44 AM
my goodness.
April 29th, 2009 at 5:55 AM
Weeping just as I did when I first read about Ashley in the blog.
Thank You Jesus for the love that is never failing , the same love that Ashley is experiencing with You now.
April 29th, 2009 at 8:47 AM
Our Savior is shining amazingly through you!
April 29th, 2009 at 10:08 AM
Oh that more might find life in the One who overwhelmed the grave. Louie thank you for sharing.
April 29th, 2009 at 11:25 AM
reading these words make me feel like I’m in Passion Conference all over again, and it felt awesome!! tanks for keep reminding us the love os God throug Ashley’s life!! love ya Louie & Passion Team!!! we remain in the Passion World Tou’s wave!!
April 29th, 2009 at 11:27 AM
oops, I forgot:
I attend on Passion World Tour Sao Paulo’ step… OMG, almost 1 year!!!
April 29th, 2009 at 2:34 PM
I attended the 2007 Thirsty conference with my wife and our oldest daughter, Ashleigh, when you stood on the stage and read Anna’s email informing you of Ashley’s passing. I am so thankful that my God is, indeed, Mighty To Save. Today I pray not only for Ashley’s family, but also for you as you continue to minister to them.
April 29th, 2009 at 3:25 PM
I have been changed forever by Ashley’s story (and that of Fruitcake!).
Thank you to her family. You are all in my thoughts and prayers today.
April 29th, 2009 at 3:30 PM
For all of Ashley’s family and friends today!
April 29th, 2009 at 3:50 PM
Isa. 41:17-20
April 29th, 2009 at 4:21 PM
Amazing story!!! God is greater than all. Praying today!
April 29th, 2009 at 5:33 PM
I minister to those who are in prison. I’ve shared Ashley’s story with them and witnessed some of the toughest people around brought to their knees…
He can move the mountains
April 29th, 2009 at 6:19 PM
I was friends with Ashely most of my life. She is missed more everyday. All this would blow her mind if she knew how many people knew her journal entries and private thoughts
April 29th, 2009 at 7:49 PM
I never cease to be amazed at the way in which God works even through tragedy to make something beautiful out of it and bring glory to Himself! And the way in which God is continuing to shine through Ashley’s life on this earth and transforming people all around the globe is simply awesome!!
However I am still praying for her family & close friends as it never gets any easier as time passes when you’ve lost someone close to you…
April 29th, 2009 at 9:46 PM
Pretty cool stuff:
http://www.thejoyfm.com/article.asp?id=1297922&SPID=19049
Thank you Carmen and all at The Joy FM!
April 29th, 2009 at 9:48 PM
I’m praying for her family and friends today.
Great testemony!
God is still using her life
April 30th, 2009 at 12:11 AM
I haven’t checked this blog site for a while and I’m glad I did today.
This weekend I will be sharing publicly for the first time, the amazing healing God has done in my life following the death of my own daughter in July 2006. Hearing Ashley’s story on the Hope and Fruitcake DVD’s brings tears every time I watch them. But the truth is, for me, the healing came when I began to look outside the box – How Great is Our God changed everything. He IS mighty to save and nothing is impossible for Him.
I pray God will continue to heal their grief and draw them closer to himself.
Don’t give up Anna!
April 30th, 2009 at 12:56 PM
WOW. Definitely loving the story of Rescue and Grace. It has really helped capture the wonder of what God has done for us in a new way!
Btw, any chance we’ll get a new podcast? Would love to hear more about Good Friday and what is going on with Passion.
May 6th, 2009 at 1:21 AM
this story never fails to remind me that no matter who we think we are, or who we think others are, death comes. It’s sad, but even sadder is the fact that many do not have anything to hope for after that so-called great equalizer.
I have something to look forward to.
It’s called Heaven.
And it’s with Him.
God Bless You, Passion.
May 6th, 2009 at 7:32 AM
Hi Louie, I’m stephen, i am a youth worker and part of a full-time youth ministry team, FAB Youth Ministries, in Cape Town, South Africa. We work full-time in two High Schools where we bring the Word of God to the teens in a fun and relevant way. The day before yesterday the team watched your dvd, Fruitcake and Ice cream, and we felt we had to share it with the school, so yesterday we were at Monument Park High School, and we showed the dvd, needless to say the story of ashley touched everyone there, and pretty soon there wasnt a dry eye in the house. Afterward we did an altar call and out of the 1200 students at the school, about 1000 of them came to know Christ as their Saviour yesterday. I was looking for a way to email the story to you directly but couldn’t find an email address, so thought I would post it here, hopefully you’ll read this. I kinda gave the in-a-nutshell version, if want to read the entire story you can check out the team’s blog on our website. The site is kinda new, so be kind lol.
Thank you for the dvd and for what its meant to us.
God Bless
Stephen
link to the blog http://faith-a-blaze.socialgo.com/magazine/read/huge-change-at-monument-park-high-school_1.html
link to the site http://faith-a-blaze.socialgo.com
May 10th, 2009 at 11:14 AM
Hey stephen
I too used to b involved in school ministry and also currently lead worship in my church. Im a huge fan of louie’s messages,and hav bought several of them. Where in CT is the school that u r involved with? I will b praying for ur +-1000 new baby Christians. Its going to b a massive follow-up mission4u2organise! Wow. I cried when i read ur entry. God is so amazing.i must say i enjoy youth ministry.there’s nothng more rewarding than when a teen meets Jesus4the first time! Yay! So happy4what u r doin4GOD! Will b praying4u&ur team too. Email me if u wana chat or share more. My email: misszimm@webmobile.co.za
keep up the excellent work! Godbless u, and louie-thank u4the dvd msgs! Keep them coming..!
May 18th, 2009 at 7:53 AM
i watched this sermon the other day. what a fascinating expirience. it is amazing how God touches us in so many different ways and how the testimonies have touched so many people across the world. it was played in our youth service yesterday and you could see that many of the young people were connected to it. Ash’s story is a real tragedy but a real winner. God has shown how through even the sadness that we go through and the loss we are still winners. i still can’t believe this..
May 18th, 2009 at 7:54 AM
luis,this was amazing
May 24th, 2009 at 12:48 AM
This feels weird, I don’t have any idea who might read this. All I know is I need help and Ashley’s story came to me when I have had my world shaken to it’s core. My husband and I lost our own Ashley 16 days ago in an auto accident. She was 16 yrs old and our princess. 9 days ago we lost our 21 yr old son, Andrew, also in an auto accident. Life as we have known it, which was truly wonderful, is over. This is all I can say for now. Please pray. Amy Ford
May 26th, 2009 at 9:09 PM
Amy,
I’m sorry to hear of your tragedy… I’m sure no words can describe your pain. My only encouragement is to check out Louie’s talk on finding HOPE when life hurts most. The first part of the talk is on youtube
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmJOko2Tygg
I pray that you and your husband find God’s hope in the midst of your pain.
Craig
May 27th, 2009 at 4:57 AM
the first time i heard the story of ash it really impacted me to change.i really want t thank GOD FOR SAVING ME and i know ash is looking down and say JACOB dnt give up cause im proud of you.
i really weant to thank louie giglio for spreading GODS WORD AND EVEN THOUGH YOU SO FAR IT JUST REMINDS ME OF HOW CLOSE GOD IS THANKS FOR BEING MY INSPIRATION AND YOU ARE REALLY MOVING MY FAMILY LOVE SUSHI FROM SOUHT AFRICA
May 30th, 2009 at 3:04 PM
I heard Louie give this sermon about Ashley at my church, North Point Community Church, several months ago. It was one of the most powerful messages I have ever heard and of course the tears were flowing. There’s an urgency for the body of Christ to share the gospel with young people because they don’t know how much time they have left. They take it for granted that they have a long life ahead of them, but sometimes people die young. Thank God for Ashley and her powerful testimony. She served God’s purpose for her life here on earth. No telling how many gave their life to the Lord after her powerful witness!
June 12th, 2009 at 12:07 PM
I work at a church in Toledo Oh and watched the Fruitcake message the other day because one of my co-workers had the DVD sitting on his desk. I just grabbed it randomly and popped it in the TV while I was working. Pretty soon I was getting nothing done and just sitting there blown away. I can’t stop thinking about how God changed this life and how he continuing to change others through it. Praise God. Thanks for sharing.
June 19th, 2009 at 6:31 AM
thanks fruitcake your so special for shaing the wonders of our Lord and saviour with ashley.
your name and the fondness that i feel ashley showed you in your nick of fruitcake is awesome .i can ever emulate our Godly actions only a little that will be an awesome thing
goodonya christa your a true angel of the Lord
God bless oyu crista snd thanks Louie for shaing her story as its helped me so much especially the peice about being a nobody in God wow that gave me so much strength and i know aashley didnt die in vain as she has helped others with her story
rich
June 24th, 2009 at 12:12 AM
i was at the student life camp i am turning 15 in july i went to gatlinburg with my church Holloway baptist church deville, Louisiana and i was touched by the story of ashely and i also want to thank u cause the camp theme was flip and louie that’s what ur message did to me and i love my lord and savior JESUS CHRIST. Again thanks for everything it changed my life…..FLIP
June 24th, 2009 at 1:33 PM
Louie i just want to thank u for telling this story. It was very helpful to my relationship with the savior Jesus Christ. It wasn’t just that story it was just about everything u said at student life 2009. I have to say my life has been flipped…..FLIP.
June 25th, 2009 at 9:50 AM
Louie….just wondered if you had seen this……I read your Blog about Ash and thought you might want to see this as well. Gatlinburg was great….thanks for everything you do…..
Jon
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNSMFlVTwhE
July 20th, 2009 at 10:37 AM
Hey Louie,
I watched your Dvd ‘fruitcake and ice cream’ last night, I was off from work today and I just felt led to watch it again. What a powerful testimony, I am not a cryer by any means of the word but this story broke something that has been inside me for so long, so yes I cried and I have started to understand Grace. I feel I have been set free. Gods Grace I tell you……. this season has been somewhat of an interesting one with the ever down than up. INDEED OUR GOD IS MIGHTY TO SAVE.
Blessings to Ahley’s family and may her story echo through the nations on our God and how ready willing and able he is to save.
Your Friend in Christ
Dean
July 24th, 2009 at 12:32 PM
i actually already knew about this, i seen it on one of your videos at church, and everyone was completely shocked and amazed at how crazy this was. i prayed for ashley’s family over and over again. Personally, i think it’s amazing how ashley started her belief in jesus christ and left us. i think this is god’s way of proving he is real and i also think that this shows that he is finding more and more people to move others to become followers.
ashley’s family is in my prayers.